Then we discussed how to know ourselves and our spouses. He explained the four temperaments to describe personality types: sanguine (enthusiastic, active, and social), choleric (short-tempered, fast, or irritable), melancholic (analytical, wise, and quiet), and phlegmatic (relaxed and peaceful). We also discussed the 5 love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Physical Touch, Act of Service and Receiving Gifts. The pastors found these two concepts to be very helpful to know themselves and their spouses, and to cultivate healthy relationships with their spouses and others. Furthermore, they discovered that the two personality descriptions – temperament and love language – are essential in any relationship, especially with those who minister with the pastor and even the congregation at large.
In the following session, we examined the qualifications of good leaders, highlighting what servant leaders should and should not do. We studied that a biblical leader…
- should not lord it over those under him (1 Peter 5:3; 2 Corinthians 1:24; 2 Corinthians 11:20);
- must maintain a humble,
- servant spirit;
- not be a dictator;
- must not exercise his authority harshly to tear down people (2 Corinthians 13:10);
- should use his authority to edify and build up;
- should not lead others to follow Him instead of Christ (1 Corinthians 1:11-17);
- should promote and preach Christ, not himself or his ministry
- should not let his position or performance cause personal pride (1 Corinthians 3:9; 2 Corinthians 12:1-10; Galatians 6:13-14);
- that a biblical leader full of pride is useless to God.
- should not lead people astray from the truth and principles of the Word (Jeremiah 23:13-14; Isaiah 3:12; James 3:1; Matthew 23:14)
- should not listen to ungodly counsel (Psalm 1:1-2; 1 Kings 12:1-15; 2 Timothy 3:1-5; 1 Corinthians 15:31-33).
What is your Temperament and Love Language?
Do you know that of your closest relationships and how does that inform how you relate and communicate with them? Can you identify how your temperament and love language aid or hinder your ability to be a leader and witness to others as described in their afternoon session?
To read about Part 2 of the conference, click here…